Stephen Colbert, How I Love Thee, Let Me Count The Ways

I don’t think Stephen Colbert needs any more press, but I am eagerly counting down the days to September 8, 2015, which is the day The Late Show With Stephen Colbert premiers. I have the series recording all ready on the DVR, and am anticipating being extra tired in the mornings on the nights I decide to stay up and watch. I long for those days when I could go to bed at 2 AM and get up at 6 AM with no issues.

I was never a regular watcher of The Daily Show or The Colbert Report, I don’t know why so I can’t say I have been a fan for years, but I thought he would be a good choice when they announced him as a replacement for David Letterman.

Warning: some of the links below have strong language and adult content; if you are shocked you probably haven't spent a lot of time with me. : )

The more I learned about him, the more I loved him, so I made a list of top 10 reasons why I love Stephen Colbert (in no particular order):

10. He can do a spot on imitation of Mick Jagger.

9. He loves being a Catholic.

8. When he breaks character he is even funnier. The spot at 2:51 is priceless.

7. He did a segment "Ask a Grown Man" which gives advice to young girls.

6. He loves "The Lord of the Rings" series and "The Hobbit" so much he played a cameo as a hobbit. Photo courtesy of Time.com.

He's kind of a nerd, and he is OK with that. He's a pretty hot nerd if you ask me.

He has done several other cameos as well.

5. He gave a touching, loving tribute to his mother. If you can watch this without crying, you are made of stronger stuff than I.

4. He's the new voice of Waze.

I updated my Waze, and I want to get lost on purpose just to listen to him!

3. The Colbeard had a life of it's own. He is a pretty hot looking Amish guy, and he should have stuck with the Wolverine, in my opinion.

Check out this picture while he was a student at Northwestern University. I don't like facial hair but I would make an exception in this case! Photo courtesy of Better with a Beard on Tumblr.

2. He funded every teacher requested grant in South Carolina.

1. He donated the funds from his SuperPac to charity.

See you on September 8, Stephen!

Photo courtesy of Vanity Fair.

What is a Hero

The recent news of the Americans who thwarted the terrorism attack on a French train has prompted me to think of heroism lately. I wholeheartedly agree, this was a tragedy averted.

It got me thinking about what is a hero.

When first thinking of a hero, Superman or Batman comes to mind at first. They larger than life and do stupendous things that are beyond the strength of an ordinary person.

After I graduated from high school I was asked to provide input on a planned symposium/workshop on heroism. I wouldn’t be around to participate but I was happy to provide my thoughts. When we talked about who was a hero I was surprised at the names that came up, some were famous, some were not. But clearly those names that were surfaced were thought to be a hero in one way or another.

My old office had a mouse problem, they would run between the cube walls and one was so audacious it would rush out into the common area. Whenever the mouse would be audacious enough to make an appearance near my cube I would scream and jump on my desk. I think my coworkers were quite entertained, every time I screamed heads would pop over the cube like whack-a-mole. I almost gave my poor cubemate, Tom, a heart attack with all of my shrieking. One night he went to Home Depot and got some mouse traps. He baited them and set them near the area where the mouse was seen. I think that day I sat with my feet off the ground the entire time. In the afternoon we heard a SNAP and the mouse was caught and disposed of. No more mouse, no more screaming.

Tom has sadly passed away since then, but Tom was my hero that day.

This Watchman Announces What She Sees

Like most people I was curious when the publication of “Go Set a Watchman” by Harper Lee was announced. However, I wasn’t a huge fan of the book or Atticus Finch. I saw the movie in Law, Justice and You class in 7^th grade (the same classroom where a certain classmate jumped out the window and subsequently received detention). I read the book in college, and I never really gave it a second thought until recently.

I put on my Kindle wish list and awaited the release date when it would magically appear on my Kindle app.

But then the reviews started, and they weren’t good.

As the publication date approached I questioned whether or not it was worth reading. In the end, I decided to form my own opinion and read it. One of the good things about having a bout of insomnia and waking up at 3 AM consistently that week was it gave me time to read.

What did I think? It’s OK…not horrible but not great. If you’re curious, I recommend giving it a try, strictly to form your own opinion, and not base your opinions on what myself or others think. To elaborate:

1.       You can tell this is Harper Lee’s first attempt at publication. The writing is rough in places, and I wonder what editorial vigor was performed on the manuscript.

2.       The pacing was a little slow in places, at some points I had to force myself to continue reading, as I sometimes got bogged down in detail that really didn’t lend itself to the story.

3.       I got in confused in the lengthy dialogue at times, I would have to go back and determine who said what, when, and who was saying what now.

4.       The back stories of Scout, Atticus and Hank were enjoyable to read and provide depth to the characters.

5.       It prompted me to look up the Bill of Rights and familiarize myself with the 10^th Amendment.

I would be remiss if I did not mention the controversy about Atticus being depicted as a racist in this book. In my opinion, this was a needed growth experience for Scout’s relationship with her father, and her views of where she comes from, and what the current events are at the time the book was written. I am being vague on purpose because I don’t want to give anything away, but I feel the whole “Atticus is a racist” outcry is a visceral reaction of some people who haven’t read between the lines and truly reflected on what is being said. When I finished, I truly wondered what Scout was going to do based on the conversation with Atticus, which is one of the things you do after finishing a book.

Granted, those that love the character of Atticus would be terribly disappointed in this revelation, but since I was not an Atticus lover I didn’t have that same reaction.

When I decided to write about this, I originally was going to base it off a story I read in Newsweek about how a bookstore in Michigan is offering refunds for those that did not like the book. However, I decided to focus on the context of the title, which is a verse from the Bible, Isaiah 21:6.

The context of that Bible verse is a vision of the fall of Babylon. The watchman is posted to look for and report “If he sees men coming on horseback, two by two, and men riding on donkeys and camels, he is to observe them carefully,” Isaiah 21:7.

The watchman (or sentry, as is written in my Good News Bible from confirmation class) reports that he has been at his post, and confirms that the men return, giving the news “Babylon has fallen! All the idols thy worshipped lie shattered on the ground.” Isaiah 21:9. (My emphasis added).

The chapter concludes with “My people Israel, you have been threshed like wheat, but now I have announced to you the good news that I have heard from the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel.” Isaiah 21: 10. (Again, my emphasis added).

Even though it is weak, I end this post with some questions for you:

Who is the Watchman?

Who is Babylon?

What are the idols?

What is the good news?

I encourage you to be your own watchman, and report what you see.

Fourth of July Memories

The Fourth of July comes at the height of the glorious, short summer in Minnesota. Thank goodness the founding fathers decided to declare independence during a sweltering Philadelphia summer instead of in the winter, it would be a much different celebration in Minnesota.

I always looked forward to Fourth of July, it was a time to have fun and see and play with the cousins, my Barbie’s and their entire wardrobe would accompany me because that meant it was time to play Barbie’s with someone else instead of me playing all of the roles.

Hosting the celebration would rotate among my dad’s family, it started out as my grandmother and great aunt hosting on alternate years, then some other families wanted in on the fun, at one point I believe it was a rotation of seven different families.

Shortly around noon we would all gather at the designated home, and before the meal we would all gather in the kitchen and pray the “Lutheran” prayer. My mom, sisters and I and some other cousins were Catholics and the invaders of this wide reaching German Lutheran clan. I would always do the sign of the cross and wonder if anyone saw me doing that.

Being Minnesotan there was a lot of food, and being German there was always a lot of beer! The table practically GROANED under all the food.  My grandmother would fry doughnuts, make baked beans from scratch, bake yeast rolls and her potato salad was famous because she cooked the dressing on the stove. There was fried chicken, and the salads were well represented: macaroni, three bean, fruit, and a beautiful seven layer salad in a cut glass bowl. Hot dishes, every kind you could think of, hamburger , potato, wild rice and of course tater tot! The desserts always included pies, apple, cherry, pumpkin, custard, there was not a frozen pie crust among them, and the pie crusts were all made with lard. My favorites were pumpkin pie (one was baked especially for me one year because the hostess knew it was my favorite) kuchen and a poppy seed cake with a cooked sugar frosting.

It was a time when our moms and grandmothers brought forth their best farm cooking, and it was a time to use beautiful serving bowls that were displayed in china cabinets that were gifts from weddings many years ago.

My mouth is watering as I think of that table.

The men would gather in the garage, under the trees, or wherever the keg was, and the women would sit in the living room or in the kitchen. The kids would go to the designated kids area. It was always so hot and humid, those farm houses did not have air conditioning, so all the doors were open to get that natural AC. There was either a stock tank or a wash tub filled with ice and water and covered with tarp to keep the pop and the non-keg beer cold. It was always a shock to plunge your arm into that freezing water while blindly grabbing a drink, hoping you got what you wanted.

Once our lunch was done, it was time to visit, play cards or other games, until chore time came and those that needed to went home to milk cows. Once the chores were done it was supper time and we all came back for a final meal before spending the evening at home and we would look forward to the next birthday get together. It wouldn’t be on the same scale as the Fourth of July, but it would rival it.

There was always a birthday, and we averaged a party almost every month. My dad’s extended family really liked to party.

As the years went on, the kids got older and we found other entertainment with friends outside of the family celebration. Then the kids grew up got married, and would maybe bring the new spouse to the family celebration for part of the day but then go to another celebration. Eventually the new families would find their own traditions and stop coming.

We have lost members of our family so the hosts dwindled down, now it is just my Mom and two other families left, and the attendance is pretty low. Mom asks me every year to come out but I decline, I miss those that are no longer with us, and I want to remember the Fourth of July as it used to be.

Happy Fourth of July, everyone!

I've Been Pinned

I realized I have been on Pinterest for almost three years now.  When I first got the beta invite I was instantly hooked (or pinned?). The first thing I pinned and made was Lemon Crinkle Cookies. I baked a batch and took them to work and told the guys about my new obsession, Pinterest.

The guys had no idea what Pinterest was, but the cookies were a hit.

Some of the things I have learned on Pinterest:

1.      Re-finish a dresser. I gave a 1950’s Danish modern blonde oak chest of drawers a sleek espresso finish.

2.      Make my own shaving lotion. Just buy the cheap shampoo and conditioner, add some hand lotion, put it in a re-purposed hand soap pump bottle and you have the best, cheapest shaving lotion ever.

3.      How to make my own laundry detergent. This one was a pin fail for me, I couldn’t get the consistency right so it was more like laundry paste.

4.      Bake macaroons.

5.      Sneak a bottle of alcohol on a cruise ship. I haven’t been on a cruise yet but it will come in handy someday.

6.       Hem jeans and keep the original hem. I’m not quite tall enough for a 34” inseam.

7.       Clean a Clarisonic.

There was a recent article about wedding boards on Pinterest. The article discussed how women who aren’t engaged or in relationships have pin boards dedicated to weddings, and whether that is a little odd, or even offensive.

One of the first boards I created was a wedding board (it’s called “Someday”). I created it, put a few pins on it, then felt a little weird creating it. I was not then, and am not now, in a relationship, so would my followers who know me think I was getting secretly married, (the first pins on the wedding board I put on the caption “Don’t get excited, I just like it” just in case someone took it the wrong way) or would they just think I’m a sad and pathetic singleton? I would add to the board now and then, but always with a twinge of not feeling quite right.

However, I have been planning my wedding since I have been five, (it’s amazing how my tastes have changed with the times) and I have bought bridal magazines before, why was this any different? Is it no different than me paging through travel magazines, dreaming of the trip of a lifetime to Europe, or me subscribing to Southern Living when I live nowhere remotely south? Or how about going to the auto show to sit in a Ferrari? No, it’s dreaming, it’s finding a visual of something that you find appealing.  The only difference is Pinterest is out there, for friends and strangers to view your dreams (and some pretty good hot dish recipes). There is the option to create “secret boards” only you can see, and make them public. I do have one secret board, I would tell you what it was, but then it wouldn’t be a secret!

My new obsession is no longer new, with almost 5,000 pins and 122 followers, so it is just an obsession at this point, and the ultimate time waster. But I love it.

Take It Down

Yesterday I had my usual 3:30 AM wakeup. Usually I try to stay still so Macy doesn’t come in and bother me and keep me awake. This morning it was one nagging thought and not the cat that kept me awake.

Charleston.

I question why I am writing this, why I put this in a blog that I started six years ago and haven’t touched since then. Part of me really compelled to put my thoughts down and share them. I realize they may be half baked, I realize many may not agree with me, but it’s something I feel like I have to do. Something woke me up at 3:30 this morning, put this thought in my head and wouldn’t let off the hook without putting down on paper.

I was fortunate to be able visit Charleston this spring. It was one of those “bucket list” places that I wanted to experience. As a lover of history I wanted to see the graceful antebellum houses on East Battery; stroll down King Street, visit the historic Charleston City Market, and experience Low Country cuisine. I did all that, and was charmed by the beauty of the azaleas, the architecture, and the friendly people that call Charleston their home.

When I heard about the shooting it was that initial numbness of disbelief. “Oh, God, not again,” I thought. As more and more news trickled in via Twitter and the Facebook during day the numbness was chipped away bit by bit and replaced with sadness. When I got home that night I looked on the map to see where the church was located. I have to admit I don’t remember seeing it, but probably drove by it, and the fact that I was there made the event more personal to me.

It made me sad that a city I enjoyed and had wonderful memories of was now a synonym for violence and murder. The murderer took that Charleston away from me, which I know is nothing compared to the loss of life and the grief of those left behind.

Jon Stewart’s monologue after the shooting really hit it home for me; I must give credit where credit is due. I have to admit I was skeptical about the emotions around the Confederate flag. I would tell myself it’s just a flag, it’s an important part of a culture, and it’s just unfortunate that some people chose to use it as a symbol of hate and ruin it for others. It’s just a flag, I told myself, people add meaning.

I no longer think it is just a flag. I can’t image walking under and seeing something every day that has been used by a group whose main purpose was instill fear and even kill a group of people.
Furthermore, the fact that South Carolina has the Confederate flag flying at the state capital is a tacit approval of those actions, furthermore a wink and a nod to the shooting.

Yes, it is part of history. Yes, it is part of a culture. But it’s time to move on.

Take it down.